Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night. Why does someone believe you when you say there are four billion stars, but check when you say the paint is wet?
Do I close them? Do I stare at his face? Do I look at the ceiling? You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice. Better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt. Did you know that dolphins are so smart that within a few weeks of captivity, they can train people to stand on the very edge of the pool and throw them fish?
Facebook, Slagbook, meet just to Shagbook, sneaking about but then ya get caughtbook. Guiltbook, Shamebook, not ya real Namebook, in ya photos ya gorgeous but really yr a Mongbook! Prankbook, Skankbook what a fuckin Crankbook. Its gettin pretty scary cos its turning into Wankbook. Scrapbook, Papbook catch the fuckin Clapbook, grab ya shitty iphone and add the shitty Appbook. Shitebook, Strifebook get a fucking Lifebook! Creepbook, Peepbook when ya take a Leakbook!
Yal even be Facebooking in ya fuckin Sleepbook. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and too stubborn to ask for directions. I never mind what I speak. Waking up every 3 hours crying for food. She finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months and the box said years. She calls me her sixty second lover. Ha ha ha, erect. Hell, do both.
Get married. Sometimes, it takes three or four people to pull us apart. And better lighting. And more women. And a pole in the middle of the room. And a buffet. Once a pun a time. Late at night? I rearrange traffic signs. People need to be challenged.
Ugly people!!! But i can fly. Of course I like my own comments. So far, I think nature is winning. While socks last.
Just a bunch of jealous countries not talking to each other. I went away and came back with a cup of water….. Is that wrong? How many fish do you have? Stop counting smart one. Fish cant Drown. Well played Wally, well played.
She uses the paragraph on the back, it tells you what the story is about. You want to travel,I want you to go. Drinks on you home. Your prolly a lil bitch who thinks your cooler than everyone. Words of our lord amen. So thanks for the compliment! Want a sandwich? I only use it when I have time: lunch time, break time, bed time, off time, this time, that time, any time, all the time. Teen: Mom can I wear this belly shirt today? Me: No. Teen: Can I pleeeaaaasseee wear this mini skirt then?
Me: Never in your life! Teen: Please, just let me wear this hot pink lipstick? Me: I know Justin… I know….. Justin: Mom, can I ask you something? Me: Sure sweetie. Justin: ……. Sincerely, Me. The funeral is at K. C you going?
The cheese and tomato joke is so funny I fingered my vagina so hard that there was blood everywhere. Then I just played with myself. All you fans out there, well I have something to say to you, if i can deal with being made fun of just like this, then so can JB or whatever because after a while you get use to it, you fans just are not getting it, you think he is hurt, he gets used to it! And all you ugly people out there, you are not going to get a chance with him now stop being jelous i mean seriously!
I am not a fan but I am telling all you fans, you need to get some common sense!!! I mean really all this publicity is great for him! I mean seriously why! JUsss ssaying. Too funny…. I reposted somebody these…. Very good. His tombstone may read — iDead…. After research a few of the weblog posts on your web site now, and I really like your method of blogging.
I bookmarked it to my bookmark web site checklist and can be checking again soon. Pls check out my web site as properly and let me know what you think. I swear Mario is a hobo, He wakes up wearing the same clothes, Runs in sewers, and steals coins. To buy what? This is just all…………..
Hahaha I agree. And people who keep saying all blondes are dumb need to stop being so hypocritical, really it just means you have no life, well that your not liveing it to the fullest anyway. I went to the shell gas station this morning. Girls fall in love with what they hear. Boys fall in love with what they see. I think the real issue is, the answer is One problem with the status …. My guess is Hispanic blonde. Impaired judgment, 2. Lose of memory and.. Engineering is the study of finding a black cat in a dark room,u know wh,when der is no cat..
Pickup line of the day: Did you get those pants on sale? The Prostitute Says No. Drowning is the act of suffocation while being submerged usually in water While I agree that suffocation and drowning have the same outcome, they are not the same thing. When one is being smothered with a pillow, they are suffocating, not drowning.
You go back to school! Suffocation is the build up of CO2 in the body not being able to escape! Not so much the lack of Oxygen!! Hey dumbass… fish cant drown thats sufficating in water… they can sufficate though….
Just for interest sake. Did you know in Japan girls keep their phones on vibrate and put them down their crotch? When a girl cancels a date she cancels it because she has to…But when an boy cancels a date he cancels it because he has two. What song is it? I dunno either. I kno yall expected for me to forget about yall, go to only twitter and not really fb anymore cause Im rich and famous now. Drowning is your lungs filling with water causing you to not be able to breath. Drowning is the lungs filling with fluid….
Every guy has three girls in his life. The pressure on the brain is inversely proportional to the time provided that the Syllabus remains constant…. Like if you get it ;D. Dance god damn it! I just met the boy when he came to atl. He is just a person. Actually he was pretty genuine.
Honestly, people who are low enough to trash Justin Bieber do not have lives. But only one is required to use two hands! Whoever thought of that is sick!!
He gets to meet new people everyday! Blond: i dont know who the father is for the other baby Doctor: ……. I had Voldemort around for curry and beer last night.. I woke up to find that the cheeky bugger had left a dark mark in the toilet.. As a former joker I think we need more status that are funny and less that make you want to kill yourself. Im Ginger, And I find it all Funny. Aka banter. So Gingers who get upset by this — Man Up x. In front of u boys say they love u ,they care,bout u ,they cant do witout u ,they wil never leave u ,n d main 1 they wil never horn u………but cum on girls tell me wat r they reli sayin behind u……..
I have brown hair. Full Time no flags on play.. NOO when life hands you lemons you squirt in someones eye. They cant see you so why bother running?? I tried to log on to Facebook. Me too. High School- We had homework? Stupid… 81 of you who liked these are dumb kids.. Knowledge is power. X went to the grocery store today, told me to help her unpack the car, there was only one bag in the trunk.
Awesome i am going to use I was going to kill the sexiest person alive and… you know the rest. I think that leaving a bunch of people scratching their heads was the point. Thanks for ruining it lol. See what you did Mairsa? You just killed any possibility of an erection. Now you need to make him a sandwich. Now everybody comments on my status, thanks guys … , :.
Dude… he is too attractive, and super talented. Just realize that there is no one that has a voice like that. And plus he just matured and his voice got deeper. And I bet your voice was just as high when you were So shut up and mind your own buisness, kay? You see how only one person liked this? Yeah that is because you are an idiot. Love marriage, it is like dancing in front of the snake and asking it to bite you. If you fail to convince, try to confuse them. Hey there! Eat, exercise, but you will die anyhow.
Nothing is illegal if you do not get caught. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Skip to primary navigation Skip to main content Skip to primary sidebar. List of Contents. Funny Facebook Status. More Related Article. Leave a Reply Cancel reply Your email address will not be published.
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