When a divorce is particularly contentious, the initial filing can set off a maelstrom of tense emotions. These temporary orders can cover everything from spousal and child support, to child custody and parenting time, to who gets to remain in the marital home. When you file for divorce first, you get the first opportunity to make requests of the court for what you want the temporary orders to look like. The court will then hold a temporary orders hearing in which your spouse will also be able to argue for what they want, but having the first word might set the tone and win you a slight advantage.
In all 50 states, filing for divorce comes with some universal basic cost, regardless of whether you work with the most expensive lawyer in your state or go completely DIY. Whatever the exact figure is, the money is due at the time of filing, so whoever decides to file the complaint might get stuck paying all of it.
Most states offer fee waivers, for one thing, or you can negotiate splitting it with your spouse on your own. However, filing first opens you up to the risk of getting stuck with this entire bill. As noted above, sometimes surprising your spouse with divorce papers is the only reliable way to keep yourself safe. However, if you know that your spouse is a fundamentally reasonable person, then we encourage you to have that difficult conversation instead of just convincing yourself that your spouse must be able to see the signs.
It also has the potential to make for a much more peaceful, amicable divorce for both of you. Doing this will show your spouse that you are going into this in good faith with a desire for fairness, which will discourage them from acting out against you. Talking this out might even help to preserve some positive aspects of your relationship, which is especially important if you have kids together. Divorce Advice. Child Custody Help. Child Custody Laws in Virginia.
Uncontested Divorce Mississippi. Uncontested Divorce Michigan. Divorce Blurb. Military Friendly — Jessica was very helpful in taking care of my cases and understood the complications related to my military career. Even when I went out of state for my job she always kept me informed and up to date. Her knowledge of the court system was advantageous in settling my cases in a short amount of time.
Recommend Highly — Jan handled a complicated custody as well as financial settlement, in an efficient and effective manner. She worked well with me, along with the opposing counsel even under the most trying circumstances. Jan also clearly had the trust of the judge and was able to work through issues before and after the decree.
As a fellow attorney, my standards were very high, and I was fortunate to work with Jan on a very difficult matter. Impressive - Had to commend Ms.
Although I was represented by someone else in the beginning of my divorce, who I believed was experienced in complex divorce cases, as they advertised. They were not. I watched Ms.
Anderson in a courtroom on another matter and called her afterward to see if she would take on my divorce case as I was unsatisfied with my attorney's representation. The Best call I ever made! I wish I had called her first, would have saved myself much aggravation, time and money. Smart and Tenacious — Nichol quickly figures out what needs to be done and is great at assessing what the court needs, from a paperwork standpoint and a mental standpoint. Thanks to Kim's no-nonsense approach, caring attitude, experience and dedication to her clients.
The process was as swift and efficient as possible. Kim and her staff were attentive and responsive, I highly recommend her and her staff. Nichol can think on her feet and communicate effectively while under pressure. Our opposing attorney was a bully and very dramatic, but Nichol never flinched. She is very compassionate, too, and I hope she never loses that. Amazing Divorce Lawyer — Listened to my concerns. Advocated on my behalf and ultimately helped me win custody of my son.
As a father it is nearly impossible to win custody. Straight forward, honest, and impeccable character. Would never want her to be opposing counsel. Referred by friend, very glad she did — I had been through 2 previous attorneys in my case that was approaching 3 years.
I left both who were dumbfounded and ill-equipped to provide effective legal strategy and forward thinking. Thank God a good friend referred me to Jan who gave me confidence, stuck to our strategy, executed a direct game plan and came out of a difficult situation with multiple victories.
Definitely a must hire for you in your most difficult situations. Why Choose. Schedule a Discreet Consultation Today! First Name. Last Name. Email Address. Phone Number. Your Message. Firm Overview. Recent Blog Posts. January 9, January 4, December 31, Quick Links. By filing first, you've started the process at a point of your choosing, while your spouse has no choice but to respond on the court's timeline.
Then, while your spouse is working on a response, you'll have the opportunity to plan your next move. The chance to make the first impression.
The initial divorce paperwork contains the petitioner's statement about the grounds reasons for the divorce. The allegations in the petition will be the first information about the case that the court sees—and when you file first, the ball is in your spouse's court to change the court's first impression.
The first opportunity to ask for temporary orders. The spouse who files first can ask the court for temporary orders before notifying the other spouse of the initial divorce filing.
These orders might limit what each spouse can do with marital funds or property, protect one spouse from the other, award temporary child custody, or grant temporary child or spousal support. Although non-filing spouses will have the chance to respond to any requests for orders, their response must be filed before or at the same times as their response to the petition. Non-filing spouses can't request their own temporary orders until after they have filed their response to the petition. Your divorce settlement agreement must include the specifics about: the reason grounds for the divorce each spouse's share of the court's filing fees how you will divide your marital property and debts whether one spouse will pay spousal support , and if so, the amount and length of the payments which spouse will become the primary caregiver custodial parent for any minor children a parenting time or visitation schedule for the non-custodial parent, and the amount of child support the non-custodial parent will pay.
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